Notelette: Real Or Not

There is no denying the toll the pandemic has taken on our lives, our mental health. I cannot imagine how “aware” I have become of myself, how I do my work, how I pale in comparison to others knowledge and results. And second guessing how real are the things other people post about themselves — is it possible? could it be? Am I that far behind? And the worst part of it is my conscious refusal to complain about it, knowing how others have taken it even harder : the people who have lost family, loved ones, friends. Those who have closed businesses. Those forced to face the anger of the staff they let go. Those who suddenly have to deal with the unknowns of paying for a house, a car, and feeding their children. Those who have gone through the torture of the Virus. Those who had lost jobs. Those who cannot see beyond tomorrow. Those who suffer illness but have to avoid seeing doctors in a virus-infested hospital. Those forced to endure the attacks of a violent spouse in the house. I cannot fairly moan when I have a home to go to, work I can do remotely, family who can stay safe in house. And yet, I have developed this unexplained nervousness and restlessness that is overwhelming; oftentimes bordering on Dread. What will all be like, really, when we get out the other end? I think the lockdown is a period that allowed so much of our fears, anger, insecurities to incubate. And when we pop the lid off of, imagine the loud boom.

Bird Observation Notes

Whoever thought to use “bird brain” as a derogatory? One of my favorite things about living in the UK is the birds. It’s not that we do not have birds in Chicago — we do, lots of sparrows, the occasional American robin (longer, more like a thrush, and a less robust-colored orange breast), and that is about it. Well, that is life in a concrete jungle. In the UK, I don’t live in a high-rise but in a house with a garden. I love that my kitchen sink is nooked in between 3 sides of windows — good cross-ventilation when I need it, and affords me a wide view out to the garden while doing the dishes. The best part of course being that I get to see what the birds outside are up to. I can tell you — Bird brains are something to aspire to. My observations:

1. Garden birds watch out for each other. They frantically call out when perceived danger is around — which most of the time means Yours Truly. Whenever I come around with their daily food rations (I am very generous), they would all scamper off. And inevitably one bird will be sounding the alarm to warn others not to land yet while I am still doing the task. I’ve seen other bird enthusiasts who’ve managed to get birds to land on their hands and feed — I wonder if I can ever do that successfully. I am slowly beginning to think this is all a matter of trust, as it is with most things. I have noticed more and more that the birds are less fearful or wary of me now. Sometimes, while I am in one part of the garden, the birds would begin feeding on the other part. They used to not even come close.
2. Foodwise, they know what they want, and they are consistent. We get most of our bird feed from Wilko — they really do it right with bird feed: quality, taste that birds seem to like, and the right price. Let’s start with the suet/fat balls, literally balled-up suets. Once we started buying the “premium” ones (more seeds and grains rather than plain suet), the birds never bothered with the plain. Wilko once ran out and we had to buy the regular ones — the birds wouldn’t touch them anymore. We even tried a source from Scotland which had good reviews on eBay — nope, the birds weren’t having them. Another, if you get the mixed seeds, they peck on everything and leave the little corn. They will come to them when there is nothing else. So when they get peck-picky, I trick them back by not refilling the feeding stations so they are forced to finish off the corn. Works every time.
3. They have quite solid social bonds. This is shown by little social bubbles and turfs they have in their activities, which is best displayed when they feed. The blue-tits in our garden seem to hog the coconut suets although they do share with other small birds. The bigger birds like starlings, blackbirds, jays, magpies and pigeons commune at a makeshift bird table that we roughly made but is now a gathering hotspot. Tghe southeast corner of our garden is inevitably the “Sparrow Corner” because that truly is a busy hub of all sorts of sparrows. They congregate on the fence, take turns on the feeding stations or the ground, — the cacophony of chirps are music to my ears. And then there are the Long-Tailed Tits, those mousy little cuties, when they come they do not in single spies but in battalions — not quite but they come in groups. They do so so adorably. One comes in, then another, then another until the next thing you know, the suet feeders are nice surrounded by their pointy little tails. My aim this year is to take a nice shot of them in the formation — they’d probably make a beautiful Christmas card this year.

More Bird Notes & observations next time.

Long-Tailed Tit by suet block (berry on top, mealworm in the bottom). :)

Everyone likes birds. What wild creatures is more accessible to our eyes and ears, as close to us and everyone in the world, as universal as a bird? ~ David Attenborough, British broadcaster and naturalist

Random Thought About Growing Old

We often think hair grows gradually.  I found out, it grows in spurts.

We often think we would grow old gradually.  Not so.  We grow old overnight.  The day I turned 40 was the day I realized I had to take my glasses off to read, that I had a paunch that runneth over the top of my jeans, that my jawline has lost the cutlass definition that it used to have. It gets worse — now add to the list back aches. Weak ankles. Knees that are not as bending. Memory that can’t be summoned. Thoughts that refuse to be censored.  And to think, I am young-old, and not yet old-old.  What’s it going to be like when I am really old. Hmmmm….

Age has taught me that what other people think of me is none of my business.
― Jane Tara, The Happy Endings Book Club

The Bird Watching Diary

They are coming more often now to the backyard. My part in that being dotting more food stations and water around, and replenishing them more often.  They also seem to be moving more in pairs, showing off in a dance sashaying their wings, and singing in unintended chorus that make mornings so much more beautiful.  I will miss this when I go back soon.  But not to worry, hubby is putting cameras inside the bird houses (we have 2) and I will be able to see how they are growing their families. If I often gripe about how Technology has alienated people from one another, I marvel at how close it has brought us to our animal friends. :)  Note:  Magpies, I learn now, are not just black and white.  They have that electric blue stripe from the edge of  wings to tail.  As if they could get prettier.

“The early bird catches the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.”  ~ Willie Nelson